Beto O'Rourke's
Path to the Nomination
Richard Ojeda's
Path to the Nomination
Post Mid-Terms
2020 Power Rankings

Wow, Sami Main got 115% hotter in just 3 years!!

Mark Capra Published March 30, 2018

This is truly unprecedented. Over the past 3 years, Adweek’s Sami Main became approximately 115% hotter!

Here’s some context from the Daily Mail:

Main…realized she had orthorexia after losing her appetite and had started eliminating entire food groups from her diet…at the height of her illness the 25-year-old weighed 65lbs. She now weighs between 90 and 95lbs.

A stunning transformation:

Accurate Rating

3 years ago 3.25
(1s and 2s are reserved for the retarded or obese).

~Presently 6.99
(bonus points for looking only 18/spinner).

If only I had the forethought to slide in there when she was a lonely vulnerable 4?? I’d be reaping the benefits today…

Goddammit.

If Vladimir Putin had sent her instead, she'd be the First Lady by now

What was the GRU thinking?? I feel like Maria Butina would have a hard time placing in a Dagestanian beauty pageant.

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MFP accurately projects

Here’s Beto’s path to the Democrat nomination

Beta has 100% name ID and approaching universal favorability among the Democrat activists that will decide the Iowa caucuses.

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THIS IS AWKWARD

Asians and Jews do better than Blacks at the SAME “failing” schools

I know what you're thinking, but it's not that either.

Low-Information Voters

Tucker Carlson: Tea Party conservatives are “morons”

EEach night, Tucker Carlson trolls liberal elites with his plucky yet affable demeanor. But this character was only written 3 years ago by the legendary Roger Ailes.

Mark Levin suddenly doesn't have a problem with the President
playing golf.

“He’s hooked on golf like drug addicts are hooked on drugs…he used to do pot, he used to do coke, now he does golf!”

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Alex Jones reveals:
Sandy Hook massacre was
“completely fake with actors”

“Sandy Hook is a synthetic, completely fake, with actors, in my view, manufactured...zero murders occurred in Newtown, you've got the green screens...there were actors, clearly.”

Alex Jones insists
he didn’t promote Pizzagate, but here’s his deleted video

In a February, Alex Jones denied ever promoting Pizzagate, blaming the media for spreading misinformation-- but here's his deleted video!

Would Marry

The Most Beautiful Intelligent Woman on Planet Earth.

This is not to say that Emma Dumont is smarter than Kaileigh Brandt (their diverging interests makes that difficult to quantify with anything approaching certainty) or more carnally desirable than Mélissa Theuriau circa 2005.

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Bwahahaha!
Rand Paul Totally Betrays Libertarians

Since Trump's erection, fmr. libertarian Rand Paul has shamelessly flip-flopped on issues including Executive Orders, Executive Powers, Immigration, and much more!

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Would Marry

The Most Beautiful Intelligent Woman on Planet Earth.

This is not to say that Emma Dumont is smarter than Kaileigh Brandt (their diverging interests makes that difficult to quantify with anything approaching certainty) or more carnally desirable than Mélissa Theuriau circa 2005.

Read More
Emergency Fap Check

Wait, Is Sarah McDaniel Actually The Hottest Smart Chick On Earth??

Earlier this year, MFP declared Emma Dumont "the most beautiful smart woman on Earth". But reader Nate recently urged MFP to reconsider.

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BREAKING:
The 2 Cutest Girls at Purdue are Republican!

According to MFP's research, this is the 1st time this has ever happened!

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The Cuckening

Wow, Jordan Peterson
got cucked hard!

Jordan Peterson is a dumb person’s idea of what a smart person is like. He’s made a fortune off making retards feel smart by parroting his pseudointellectual “common sense”.

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Robert Kraft’s girlfriend hotter than you might expect

The Regime

MFP accurately commemorates Charlottesville

The Regime

Wow, Sean Hannity cucks Roger Stone!

The Regime

Rush Limbaugh criticizes George W. Bush for the 1st time ever

I apologize in advance for this sexist article