Please God, let dumbass teachers carry guns

MP   |   Published February 24, 2018

Please dear God, let the Trump regime gets its way in arming the nation’s 3.2 million dumbass teachers.

Teacher Screening, Best Case Scenario

# of applications to carry guns (if only for the bonus/OT) Conservatively, 10%. 300,000
# of criminal teachers that pass background checks due to bureaucratic incompetence Conservatively, let’s assume the gov’t only fucks up 10% of the background checks (it will surely be higher) 30,000
# that should pass background checks, but are clumsy motherfuckers, secretly emotionally unstable, and/or stupid idiots Conservatively, let’s assume 20% (it will surely be higher) 60,000

That’s 90,000 armed teachers that would have been assigned as cannon fodder in George Washington’s militias.

Assuming these teachers only fuck up at the same rate as police officers, we can conclude conservatively, at minimum— Trump’s policy would lead to:

  • ~1,800 stolen guns.
  • ~900 accidental shootings
  • ~450 criminal shootings
  • ~300 guns used in rape
  • ~300 guns used in murder

While statistically insignificant in a nation of 320 million, these “tragedies” will be blamed on the Trump regime– which would redound to the benefit of the country overall.

For the record, MFP is strongly pro-2A, and only opposes the NRA on the grounds that it supports the Trump regime and the Nazi Party.

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