MFP apologizes to John McCain after Trumpcare vote

Mfp   Published July 29, 2017

Dear Señor McCain,

Some of this was prior to my tenure, but over the years, MFP has delighted in:

  • Accusing you of being a traitor, just for clicks.
  • Accusing you of allying w/ neo-Nazis, just to defend Russia’s incursions into Crimea and Ukraine.
  • Promoting vile conspiracy theories about your time as a POW that I knew to be false, just to defend Trump’s “I like people who weren’t captured” remark (I am personally guilty of this).

And while it is true that you advance a neoconservative agenda that has killed or displaced millions– the truth is, I don’t really give a fuck about Iraqis. To be honest, my libertarian, anti-war views are just an excuse to hate Israel and [redacted]s.

But today, America faces a far greater threat than male [redacted]s.

Political parties and low-information tribalism are the scourge of our time. Anyone who defies their party for any reason is a hero, and w/ your vote to defeat Trumpcare, you are a hero more than most.

In conclusion, I was a dick, and I’m sorry.

Beginning late this year or early next, MFP will return to the shameful low-information model to take advantage of uneducated voters. But until then, I pledge to redouble my efforts to defend American values.

If Vladimir Putin had sent her instead, she'd be the First Lady by now

What was the GRU thinking?? I feel like Maria Butina would have a hard time placing in a Dagestanian beauty pageant.

Read More
MFP accurately projects

Post-Midterms 2020 Power Rankings

The very millisecond Beta enters the race, he occupies the Young Charismatic Lane, and instantly ends the campaigns of Cory Booker, Eric Garcetti, and Eric Swalwell.

Read More

Actually, Trump can unilaterally fire Mueller

Many nerds mistakenly believe the Administrative Procedure Act of 1946 prevents Trump from firing Special Counsel Robert Mueller. Here's why they're wrong.

Read More
Low-Information Voters

Tucker Carlson: Tea Party conservatives are “morons”

Each night, Tucker Carlson trolls coastal liberal elites with his plucky yet affable tribalism. But this character was only written 3 years ago by legedary TV executive Roger Ailes.

Mark Levin suddenly doesn't have a problem with the President
playing golf.

“He’s hooked on golf like drug addicts are hooked on drugs…he used to do pot, he used to do coke, now he does golf!”

Read More

Alex Jones reveals:
Sandy Hook massacre was
“completely fake with actors”

“Sandy Hook is a synthetic, completely fake, with actors, in my view, manufactured...zero murders occurred in Newtown, you've got the green screens...there were actors, clearly.”

Alex Jones insists
he didn’t promote Pizzagate, but here’s his deleted video

In a February, Alex Jones denied ever promoting Pizzagate, blaming the media for spreading misinformation-- but here's his deleted video!

Would Marry

The Most Beautiful Intelligent Woman on Planet Earth.

This is not to say that Emma Dumont is smarter than Kaileigh Brandt (their diverging interests makes that difficult to quantify with anything approaching certainty) or more carnally desirable than Mélissa Theuriau circa 2005.

Read More

Bwahahaha!
Rand Paul Totally Betrays Libertarians

Since Trump's erection, fmr. libertarian Rand Paul has shamelessly flip-flopped on issues including Executive Orders, Executive Powers, Immigration, and much more!

Read More
Would Marry

The Most Beautiful Intelligent Woman on Planet Earth.

This is not to say that Emma Dumont is smarter than Kaileigh Brandt (their diverging interests makes that difficult to quantify with anything approaching certainty) or more carnally desirable than Mélissa Theuriau circa 2005.

Read More
Emergency Fap Check

Wait, Is Sarah McDaniel Actually The Hottest Smart Chick On Earth??

Earlier this year, MFP declared Emma Dumont "the most beautiful smart woman on Earth". But reader Nate recently urged MFP to reconsider.

Read More

BREAKING:
The 2 Cutest Girls at Purdue are Republican!

According to MFP's research, this is the 1st time this has ever happened!

Read More
The Cuckening

Wow, Jordan Peterson
got cucked hard!

Jordan Peterson is a dumb person’s idea of what a smart person is like. He’s made a fortune off making retards feel smart by parroting his pseudointellectual “common sense”.

Read More

The Regime

Alex Jones’ lawyer: My client is just playing a character

Would Smash

You know who I want to make love to? 1/3 of Hillary Clinton’s press corps

Alex Jones: “Redheads are even stronger than Africans”

Alabama governor’s alleged mistress, would ya…for $588,550?

The Regime

Only 5% of Germans trust Trump

Do you even UFC bro?

UFC’s Joe Rogan: Hillary Clinton is a “cunt”