The arc of Cathy McMorris Rodgers’ hair bends towards MILF

MP   |   Published March 19, 2017

Pre-Trump, GOP strategerists believed it was vitally important for Republicans to reach out to women and minorities. In that context, unqualified airhead Cathy McMorris Rodgers quickly rose through House leadership ranks. The plan was as follows:

  • Trump loses in a landslide in ’16.
  • Paul Ryan resigns in ’18 to run for ’20.
  • Cathy McMorris Rodgers becomes House Speaker– and, if he refuses to step aside, expose Kevin McCarthy’s [redacted].

Trump’s victory threw a monkey wrench into these plans, but that is neither here nor there.

Hair-wise, while there have certainly been speed bumps along the way– the overall arc of Cathy McMorris Rodgers hair bends towards MILF…

Busy mom haircut

Upper-middle class mom haircut + teeth whitening

MILF makeover haircut + more teeth whitening

I think it’s fair to say that this is her post-18 prime…

Spice up marriage haircut

This is probably a bridge too far…

Latest haircut

Still not perfect, obviously?? But it goes a long way towards addressing the erectorate’s concerns…

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