Abella Danger |
8.0 |
Quintessential butterface. |
Abby Hornacek |
8.75 |
Penalized for height. |
Abby Huntsman |
7.0 |
Penalized for looking like her dad. |
Ainsley Earhardt |
6.99 |
Penalized for age (40's). |
AJ Applegate |
8.75 |
If she was anorexic, she'd be a 10. |
AJ Delgado, Jason Miller's fmr. mistress |
5.99 |
|
Alex Witt |
4.75 |
|
Alexa Bliss, WWE superstar |
9.25 |
|
Alexis Levinson |
6.5 |
|
Alexis Wineman circa 2012 |
9.0 |
Her love could be my salvation. |
Allison Williams, Brian Williams daughter |
7.25 |
Penalized for looking like her dad. |
Alisyn Camerota |
5.25 |
|
Amanda Carpenter |
6.5 |
Basic bitch. |
Amy Jackson |
9.5 |
Perfect face. |
Amy Kremer, the fake conservative activist |
3.75 |
I'd splooge on her, tbh. |
Ana Kasparian |
6.25 |
I'm just not into it, she looks like an angry maid. |
Ana Navarro |
3.99 |
I'd splooge on her, tbh. |
Andrea Tantaros |
6.5 |
+ body, dumb face. |
Ann Coulter |
5.99 |
Penalized for age (50's). |
Anna Kooiman |
8.0 |
She looks like a sexy chipmunk. |
Andrea Mitchell |
2.25 |
Disgusting. |
Antonietta Collins |
6.25 |
Don't be fooled by the makeup and angles. |
April Ryan |
2.25 |
Disgusting. |
April Ponnuru, Ramesh Ponnuru's wife |
2.99 |
I'd do her, tbh. |
Ashley Parker |
5.0 |
|
Aubrey O'Day, Don Jr.'s fmr. mistress (Prime) |
8.25 |
|
Andrea Catsimatidis, Manhattan GOP Chair |
7.75 |
My mind says "gross", but my penis says "10/10". |
Barbara Mikulski |
0.75 |
Needs burka. |
Baskin Champion |
9.49 |
10 face, but no boobs :( |
Baskin Champion's Sister |
7.0 |
Much less attractive than her sister. |
Belen Sisa the Undocumented Student |
6.5 |
|
Bristol Palin (Prime, circa post-weight loss, pre-all the babies) |
7.75 |
|
Britney Spears (Prime, circa "Oops, I Did It Again") |
9.0 |
|
Brooke Baldwin |
6.49 |
Penalized for age (40's). |
Carly Fiorina |
5.0 |
|
Carmen Callaway |
9.49 |
Bonus points for looking ~18. |
Carrie Prejean (Prime) |
9.25 |
|
Caroline Heldman, that chick who accused Fox News |
6.5 |
Penalized for age (40's). |
Catherine Rampell |
6.49 |
Often overrated due to being surrounded by ugly old people. |
Chelsea Clinton |
2.99 |
Disgusting. |
Chelsea the Code Pink Protester (Chelsea Byers) |
7.75 |
Her love could be my salvation. |
Christiane Amanpour |
3.5 |
Disgusting. |
Claire McCaskill |
2.75 |
I'd splooge on her, tbh. |
Courtney Byrd |
9.0 |
|
Dana Bash |
5.5 |
|
Dana Loesch |
6.49 |
I'd do her. |
Dana Perino |
6.25 |
Penalized for age (40's). |
Daniela Lopez Osorio |
8.75 |
Face is highly overrated. |
Danielle Bregoli, the "Cash Me Outside, How Bow Dah" girl |
N/A |
N/A |
Danielle Weisberg |
7.0 |
She can get it. |
Delaney Targgaryen |
N/A |
N/A |
Denise Odie Joseph II, Dinesh D'Souza's fmr. mistress |
5.25 |
I'd do her, tbh. |
Dishwasher Lady (Prime) |
8.99 |
|
Dominika the Nuclear Power Plant Intern |
8.99 |
Self-explanatory |
Eboni K. Williams, the Fox News Aunt Jemima |
6.49 |
Penalized for race. |
Elizabeth Warren |
2.5 |
Needs burka. |
Elizabeth Nolan Brown |
5.75 |
|
Ellison Barber |
7.25 |
Down 10% from 2014 prime. |
Emma DiGiovine, Jesse Watters fmr. mistress |
6.99 |
Quintessential butterface. |
Erin Burnett |
6.75 |
Penalized for age (40's). |
Erin Schrode, the liberal with a never ending list of grievances |
6.49 |
Disturbingly deep voice. |
Evgenia Medvedeva |
9.0 |
That Sailor Moon outfit tho. |
Gina Loudon |
6.5 |
MILF. |
Giselle Leon (Prime) |
8.25 |
|
Gloria Allred |
2.5 |
You know what? Would. |
Gloria Borger |
3.75 |
|
Haley Byrd |
7.49 |
Would be so hot w/ woman's haircut. |
Harris Faulkner |
4.0 |
Penalized for race. |
Heather Childers |
6.25 |
She's like West Virginia hills folks' idea of what a hot chick looks like. |
Heidi Cruz |
4.0 |
|
Heidi Heitkamp |
1.0 |
Needs burka. |
Hillary Clinton |
2.5 |
Disgusting. |
Hillary Clinton (prime) |
7.0 |
|
Hillary McLellan the Chick That Lied About Cancer |
7.25 |
|
Hope Hicks |
6.5 |
Beautiful from a great distance. |
Hwang Mi Hee (Prime) |
8.75 |
Hottest Asian chick to ever live. |
Irin Carmon |
6.75 |
|
Ivanka Trump |
6.75 |
Penalized for age. |
Ivanka Trump (Prime) |
9.5 |
|
Jeanette Dousdebes Rubio, Marco Rubio's wife |
5.75 |
|
Jedediah Bila |
7.75 |
Penalized for age. |
Jennifer Grossman, the fake libertarian |
6.25 |
Absolute GGILF. |
Jillian Kirk, the racist MSU student |
7.5 |
|
Jo Marney, the Nazi |
6.25 |
Has an old lady face. |
Joy Behar |
1.99 |
Needs burka. |
Joy Reid (Joy Ann Reid) |
2.25 |
Needs burka. |
Julia Ioffe |
6.75 |
Penalized for age. |
Julie Mason |
2.75 |
I'd splooge on her, tbh. |
Kacey Jordan (Ted Cruz controversy). |
7.75 |
Bonus points for looking ~18. |
Kaileigh Brandt |
10.0 |
Not that hot, but genetically perfect. |
Kaitlan Collins |
6.5 |
|
Kamala Harris |
4.99 |
|
Kanadajin3 (pre-Muslim conversion) |
6.5 |
I'd do her. |
Kasie Hunt |
5.5 |
|
Kat Timpf |
7.49 |
|
Kata Sarka, the Hungarian chick that Trump tried to bang. |
7.5 |
+++ body, avg. face. |
Kate Bouldan |
6.5 |
|
Kate Upton (Prime) |
9.0 |
|
Kathryn Limbaugh, Rush Limbaugh's wife |
4.75 |
|
Katie Glueck |
6.99 |
Bonus points for looking ~18. |
Katie Lou Samuelson |
6.5 |
Penalized for height. |
Katie Nolan |
7.0 |
Face is overrated. |
Katie Packer, the flip-flopping RINO |
2.75 |
Disgusting. |
Katie Pavlich |
6.5 |
Penalized for gigantism. |
Katrina Pierson |
6.0 |
Looks like an evil koala bear. |
Katy Tur |
6.75 |
Disturbingly unattractive without makeup. |
Kaylee Moats, the Chick with No Vagina |
7.25 |
|
Kayleigh McEnany |
7.0 |
She looks like a sexy, retarded fish. |
Kellyanne Conway |
4.75 |
Facially repulsive. |
Kim Yo-jong, Kim Jong-un's sister |
2.99 |
Needs burka. |
Kimberly Guilfoyle |
6.5 |
Repulsive without makeup. |
Kinga Duda |
7.0 |
Basic bitch. |
Kirsten Gillibrand |
5.5 |
|
Kirsten Powers |
5.5 |
|
Kristen Soltis Whatsherface |
7.0 |
|
Kristen Stewart |
8.25 |
|
Kristin Tate |
7.99 |
Often overrated due to being surrounded by ugly old people. |
Kristine Leahy |
8.25 |
I dunno, she vascillates from 7.5 to 9.0. |
Kyle Nolan, Eric Bolling's assistant |
8.25 |
LTR material, but not hot per se. |
Laci Green, the adorable feminazi |
7.25 |
Chubbiness offset by implied promiscuity. |
Laura Ingraham |
6.25 |
Penalized for age (50's). |
Laura Jayes, the reporter who broke the Turnbull-goofing-on-Trump story |
6.5 |
+ body, mediocre face. |
Lauren Southern |
6.49 |
Basic Bitch. |
Lee Ann McAdoo |
6.5 |
+ boobs, mediocre face. |
Lili Simmons |
8.5 |
At first glance, easily a 9-- but her face looks jacked up under certain angles/lighting. |
Liv Morgan |
9.0 |
|
Liz Plank |
6.5 |
Manly face offset by heavy use of feminine wiles. |
Louise Linton, Steve Mnuchin's wife |
6.49 |
Her angry ex-wife face is a turnoff. |
Lyda Loudon |
6.75 |
|
Maria Bartiromo |
6.0 |
Penalized for age (50's). |
Marianne Copenhaver, the Neocon Girl |
6.49 |
Sexy hair and glasses conceal jacked up face. |
Marilyn Monroe (Prime) |
6.75 |
Basic bitch by today's standards. |
Marsha Blackburn |
5.0 |
Penalized for age (late 60's). |
Martha MacCallum |
5.25 |
Penalized for age (50's). |
Meghan McCain |
5.25 |
I'd splooge on her, tbh. |
Mélissa Theuriau circa 2005 |
10.0 |
Perfect 10 circa 2005. |
Melania Trump |
5.75 |
Beautiful from a great distance. |
Megyn Kelly |
6.75 |
Penalized for age (40's). |
Michelle Fields |
6.49 |
+ body, mediocre face. |
Michelle Malkin |
4.25 |
She has to go back. |
Michelle Obama |
2.99 |
|
Michelle Runde |
7.0 |
Cutest gainfully employed vegan ever. |
Mika Brzezinski |
5.49 |
I'd do her, tbh. |
Mila Moire, the artist who lays eggs with her vagina (Prime) |
8.49 |
|
Minka Kelly |
8.99 |
She is as hot as you can humanly be without breaking 9. |
Molly Line |
5.75 |
Penalized for age (40's). |
Monica Crowley |
5.0 |
I think I'd rather do Marsha Blackburn, tbh. |
Monica Lewinsky circa Clinton affair |
5.75 |
I'd do her, tbh. |
Nadya from Pussy Riot (Nadezhda Tolokonnikova) |
6.25 |
Ugly face offset by heavy use of feminine wiles. |
Nasim Aghdam |
5.5 |
Penalized for age. |
Natasha Bertrand |
6.5 |
Really cute, but face has slight hint of Down syndrome. |
Nancy Pelosi |
2.00 |
Disgusting. |
Natalia Lima, Ed Henry's fmr. mistress. |
6.75 |
Older than photos would suggest. |
Noor Tagouri, the Hottest Muslim |
7.25 |
|
Norah O'Donnell (Prime) |
8.25 |
LTR material. |
Olivia Harlan |
9.0 |
|
Paige, WWE superstar |
6.75 |
|
Paige, WWE superstar (Prime) |
8.99 |
|
Peyton List |
8.49 |
|
Poppy Harlow |
5.99 |
I don't get the appeal. |
Rachel Maddow |
4.5 |
I'd splooge on her, tbh. |
Riley Reid |
9.25 |
|
Ronna McDaniel, GOP Chairthing |
3.0 |
Has Down syndrome face. |
Roseanne Barr |
1.75 |
Needs burka. |
Salena Zito |
1.99 |
Needs burka. |
Sami Main |
7.0 |
Bonus points for looking ~18. |
Sammi Hanratty |
8.75 |
Bonus points for looking ~18. |
Sandra Smith |
6.5 |
Penalized for age. |
Sarah Tiana, the hypocritical comedian |
6.49 |
|
Sarah Flores, Trump Propaganda Czar |
5.99 |
Oh so close to being hot. |
Sarah McDaniel, the model with retard eyes |
9.49 |
A 10 but not a 10. |
Sarah Huckabee |
2.75 |
Disgusting. |
Sarah Palin |
5.75 |
Penalized for age (50's). |
Sarah Palin (Prime) |
6.99 |
|
SE Cupp |
6.5 |
Manly jawline, fat arms. |
Shannon Bream |
6.75 |
Penalized for age (late 40's). |
Simona Mangiante, George Papadopoulos' wife |
6.5 |
Do not be fooled by the Instagram angles. |
Shera Berchard (Prime) |
8.0 |
|
Stephanie Ann Cook |
8.75 |
|
Stormy Daniels circa when Trump smashed |
7.5 |
Mediocre face. |
Tamara Holder (Prime) |
6.5 |
Submissive personality makes up for repulsive face. |
Tara Palmieri |
7.49 |
Classic marry her to get her off the market, then realize you've made terrible mistake. |
Taylor Riggs |
7.25 |
LTR material. |
Tiffany Thompson, Ezekiel Elliot's ex |
7.25 |
|
Tiffany Trump |
7.25 |
Face has slight hint of Down syndrome, but bonus points for age. |
Tomi Lahren |
7.0 |
+ body, angry ex-wife face. |
Trish Regan |
6.5 |
Penalized for age (late 40's). |
Tulsi Gabbard |
5.25 |
Looks like a giant eskimo w/ terrible skin.. |
Whoopi Goldberg |
1.5 |
Needs burka. |
Zoey Kush |
8.5 |
Bonus points for looking ~18. |