Mofo Politics
Mofo Politics

You know who I want to spend the rest of my life with? Naked Shakespeare in the park chick   May 23, 2016

Mark Capra Tweet Email

The Independent: Central Park hosts all-female, naked production of “The Tempest”.

As you would expect, it was mostly a bunch of gross chicks.

Credit The Independent.

With one stunning exception: Marisa Roper…

I know what you’re thinking:

She’s probably a liberal, bro! 60-year-old conservative chicks who don’t even get periods anymore like Ann Coulter are so much hotter bro!

My girlfriend is way better looking, bro!

You don’t have a girlfriend! And even if you did, she doesn’t look like this…

And she can’t do this…

A video posted by Marisa Roper (@marisa.roper) on


Best case scenario

I get bitten by a vampire, but through a quirk of fate, I become a vampire with a soul– and spend my days brooding and trying to atone for my sins.

And I just happen to save Marisa from violent Bernie bros.

And even though I fall in love w/ her instantly? At the same time? I don’t want to fall for her because I never want to be vulnerable again!!

Yes, I almost certainly will end up sacrificing my un-life at some point– but it will be totally worth it.

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