MFP accurately reax to Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

Mfp   Published June 27, 2018

ELY5: In a shocking upset (-36 to +15 in 3 weeks), 28-year-old self-described socialist Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez defeated high-ranking Democrat incumbent Joe Crowley in NY-14. This triggered Hannity and the Alt-Reich, who immediately went into fearmongering socialism hyperdrive.

Here’s the thing.

There have been like 10,000 socioeconomic systems in the course of human history, and there will be 10,000 more long after we’re dead. The notion that our 1.5-century-old mixed economy will be humanity’s final organizing principle is retarded. There’s like 5 billion years left until the sun extinguishes!

All socioeconomic systems work anyway

Free markets, centralized gov’t, low taxes, high taxes, tyranny, laissez-faire, fascism, socialism– they all work under the right circumstances, as illustrated below.

Pax Romana Gov’t: Caesar Augustus and his successors ruled as emperors, while a neutered Roman Senate served as a rubber stamp. Economically, the Roman Empire drifted from command economy to feudalism.

Results: 200 years of peace, prosperity, and imperial expansion unlike the world had ever known.

Han Dynasty Gov’t: A tyrannical regime whose central planners tinkered w/ the economy and the destinies of millions as they saw fit.

Results: Known as the Golden Age, the Han Dynasty’s 4-century rule brought about paper money, guns, and decimal numbers.

15th Century Spain Gov’t: A religious monarchy ffs.

Results: The 1st global superpower w/ territory on 5 continents, Spain was the richest and most powerful country on Earth.

Nazi Germany Gov’t: Fascism/populism.

Results: You can say what you want, but the economy improved drastically and the trains ran on time. For an anti-socialist party, the Nazis were pretty big on public assistance and social welfare programs for the non-murdered.

USSR Gov’t: Communism/fascism.

Results: You can say what you want, but from ~1920 to 1960, Russia went from an agriculture-based backwater rejected by Europe to an industrialized global superpower rivaled only by the US of A (which is like finishing 2nd in a 3-point shooting contest to Steph Curry).

To this day, Russia remains one of the most feared nations on Earth thanks in large part to the work of Lenin & Stalin.

7 of the 10 Top Economies on Earth Gov’t: Various, all 7 w/ nationalized or “socialist” universal healthcare.

Results: Top 10 economies on Earth.

Top 10 Fastest Growing Economies on Earth Gov’t: Various, ranging from heavily-centralized to borderline murderous, tyrannical regimes.

Results: Top 10 fastest growing economies on Earth.

You could even argue that the hunter-gatherer system was a resounding success since it fed humanity for like 100,000 years, which is kind of the point.


Nothing matters. The only objectively correct way to spend one’s short time on Earth is experiencing as many drugs as possible, and more importantly, having sex with as many women as possible so as to dominate and ruin them for all future suitors.

If Vladimir Putin had sent her instead, she'd be the First Lady by now

What was the GRU thinking?? I feel like Maria Butina would have a hard time placing in a Dagestanian beauty pageant.

Read More
MFP accurately projects

Post-Midterms 2020 Power Rankings

The very millisecond Beta enters the race, he occupies the Young Charismatic Lane, and instantly ends the campaigns of Cory Booker, Eric Garcetti, and Eric Swalwell.

Read More

Actually, Trump can unilaterally fire Mueller

Many nerds mistakenly believe the Administrative Procedure Act of 1946 prevents Trump from firing Special Counsel Robert Mueller. Here's why they're wrong.

Read More
Low-Information Voters

Tucker Carlson: Tea Party conservatives are “morons”

Each night, Tucker Carlson trolls coastal liberal elites with his plucky yet affable tribalism. But this character was only written 3 years ago by legedary TV executive Roger Ailes.

Mark Levin suddenly doesn't have a problem with the President
playing golf.

“He’s hooked on golf like drug addicts are hooked on drugs…he used to do pot, he used to do coke, now he does golf!”

Read More

Alex Jones reveals:
Sandy Hook massacre was
“completely fake with actors”

“Sandy Hook is a synthetic, completely fake, with actors, in my view, murders occurred in Newtown, you've got the green screens...there were actors, clearly.”

Alex Jones insists
he didn’t promote Pizzagate, but here’s his deleted video

In a February, Alex Jones denied ever promoting Pizzagate, blaming the media for spreading misinformation-- but here's his deleted video!

Would Marry

The Most Beautiful Intelligent Woman on Planet Earth.

This is not to say that Emma Dumont is smarter than Kaileigh Brandt (their diverging interests makes that difficult to quantify with anything approaching certainty) or more carnally desirable than Mélissa Theuriau circa 2005.

Read More

Rand Paul Totally Betrays Libertarians

Since Trump's erection, fmr. libertarian Rand Paul has shamelessly flip-flopped on issues including Executive Orders, Executive Powers, Immigration, and much more!

Read More
Would Marry

The Most Beautiful Intelligent Woman on Planet Earth.

This is not to say that Emma Dumont is smarter than Kaileigh Brandt (their diverging interests makes that difficult to quantify with anything approaching certainty) or more carnally desirable than Mélissa Theuriau circa 2005.

Read More
Emergency Fap Check

Wait, Is Sarah McDaniel Actually The Hottest Smart Chick On Earth??

Earlier this year, MFP declared Emma Dumont "the most beautiful smart woman on Earth". But reader Nate recently urged MFP to reconsider.

Read More

The 2 Cutest Girls at Purdue are Republican!

According to MFP's research, this is the 1st time this has ever happened!

Read More
The Cuckening

Wow, Jordan Peterson
got cucked hard!

Jordan Peterson is a dumb person’s idea of what a smart person is like. He’s made a fortune off making retards feel smart by parroting his pseudointellectual “common sense”.

Read More

Rush Limbaugh: I’m not a neocon

The Blaze’s Amy Holmes’ 1980’s old detective guy glasses

Would Smash

Greta Van Susteren’s fmr. assistant Jennifer Holton, would ya?

Rand Paul’s intellect vs. Rick Perry’s intellect

Would Smash

Hottest chick in Selfie-gate wasn’t even taking a selfie

Michael Savage: Obama is “the most intelligent President that we’ve had in 50 years”